About Charlotte Claire
When the storms of life come, Bubba and Mary McCants cling to the One who will see them through and bless them with beauty for the ashes left behind. One of the most devastating storms they endured was the loss of their daughter, Charlotte Claire.
She was 30 weeks in utero when Mary knew something wasn’t right. Mary is a post-partum nurse, so she is always in tune with her body and her babies during pregnancy. Charlotte was active in the womb that morning as Mary sat at the breakfast table with her family. A little later, as she and Bubba were traveling to Crestview for an eye doctor’s appointment with their oldest daughter, Norah, Mary noticed Charlotte was unusually still. Bubba held onto hope that everything was all right and tried to comfort Mary, but he knew the look of concern on his wife’s face.
The couple conceived all of their children through In Vitro Fertilization (IVF), which means each pregnancy has been high-risk. Their first egg retrieval process resulted in five embryos. Norah Lynn came first. The second embryo transfer failed, but with the third came daughter Elizabeth Kate. They tried again, but suffered a miscarriage and then another failed transfer. A second round of egg retrieval resulted in three embryos, of which Charlotte Claire was the first.
Challenges came during this pregnancy including a blood clot in Mary’s uterus and bleeding when Charlotte was just six weeks into her development. Another heavy bleed at 9 weeks put Mary mostly on rest for the next trimester.
With each week, Charlotte grew, and Bubba and Mary were happy to see her progressing. By 30 weeks, they were still cautious but more confident they would soon be holding their healthy baby girl.
But on the way to Norah’s appointment, Mary’s confidence waned. She thought perhaps the long car ride had lulled Charlotte to sleep. When more time had passed, Mary started poking and pushing on her belly to wake her up. She even tried eating and drinking, and when that didn’t work either, they called the midwife, who advised them to head to the nearest hospital. Two ultrasounds confirmed the unexpected—Charlotte’s heart was not beating. The news shocked Bubba and Mary. They knew something was wrong, but they didn’t expect their daughter to be gone.
Silence filled the room, and the medical team left. Bubba’s thoughts immediately turned to his wife along with an overwhelming feeling of helplessness. God entrusted him to be the provider, the supporter, and the strength for his wife and children, but he was feeling defeated and at a loss for how to comfort Mary.
They held each other and cried, and peace came to Bubba’s heart with Isaiah 55 verse 8:
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.”
Bubba and Mary would praise Him in the midst of this terrible storm. But it wasn’t over. Mary still had to deliver their baby. She chose to do this at her home hospital in Panama City where she and Bubba would be blanketed in support from fellow co-workers.
Worship music was playing in the room the whole time, and when Mary delivered Charlotte, the midwife discovered what had gone wrong. Charlotte’s umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck and her foot, and there was a knot in the cord. Charlotte was not receiving blood flow. Mary knew there was nothing she could have done to prevent this from happening, but she couldn’t stop the “what if I …” questions in her mind.
Charlotte looked perfect. She looked like she should be breathing. The celebration they experienced with the births of Norah and Elizabeth was replaced with grief and silence. They dressed Charlotte in her going home outfit, and friend Bridget Lipawen of A Little Muse Photography came to take bereavement pictures as keepsakes for their family. Another friend, Shane Southerland of Southerland Funeral Home, brought a car seat to carry Charlotte away.
Charlotte was born April 22, 2021, and was laid to rest at Kent-Forest Lawn Cemetery. Her grave is marked with a beautiful headstone that reminds family, friends, and even strangers of Charlotte Claire McCants, who always will be one of Bubba’s and Mary’s five children. Daughter Ruby Caroline is the last IVF baby for the couple, who also have been blessed with the adoption of their son Jayce Landon.
“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”
James 1:17
Mary and Bubba chose a Scripture for each of their children while they were in the womb. James 1:17 is Charlotte’s. It appears on her headstone and is a reminder to all that even in this turbulent storm, God is constant and ever-present, and every child is a good and perfect gift from Him.
Bubba and Mary miss their daughter and want to honor her memory. They established The Charlotte Claire Foundation in remembrance of their precious girl. Through the foundation, Bubba and Mary share their experience to encourage others fighting this same battle, and that they can overcome it by the love and grace of Jesus Christ. The foundation also serves as a fund-raiser for the Gulf Coast Children’s Advocacy Center, which has used the first donations to purchase children’s books and dopplers so that mothers can hear their baby’s heartbeat. Moms read aloud, and as the babies hear their voices, their heartbeats quicken.
Knowing that Charlotte is in heaven, and that they will get to see her again one day, brings Bubba and Mary peace and some comfort.
Until then, they will keep her memory alive on Earth and tell her story to bring the light of Christ into someone else’s darkness.
